SEPTEMBER 8, 2023

Full News Archive

• Headline: Black Nurses Against Tuberculosis on Staten Island. Impact: The recruitment of Black nurses created a butterfly effect where the nursing profession slowly began to diversify, leading to an eventual rise in healthcare equity debates, which somehow still haven't been solved 100 years later. Glad to see progress is a slow burn!. Fact: Despite tuberculosis being a deadly disease, it was also the perfect excuse for 20th-century social gatherings—'Come for the health benefits, stay for the coughing fits!'.
• Headline: Controversy Over D.E.I. Statements in Academia. Impact: The debate over D.E.I. statements on college campuses sent shockwaves through academia, ultimately leading to a future where students will write essays on why they didn’t submit their diversity statement—it's the academic version of 'the dog ate my homework.'. Fact: College campuses: where the most heated debates are about diversity statements, while the real issues (like student debt) just sit quietly in the corner, sipping their coffee..
• Headline: The Reality of Streaming Show Cancellations. Impact: The current trend of canceling shows on streaming platforms will likely lead to future historians debating the lost potential of series that could have changed pop culture—like a butterfly flapping its wings, but instead of storms, we get endless reboots.. Fact: Fun fact: The only thing being canceled faster than shows on streaming platforms is your hopes for a long-lasting relationship..
• Headline: A Portrait Miniature Was Muse to Mickalene Thomas. Impact: Mickalene Thomas's portrait miniature exhibition may inspire future artists to reclaim lost narratives, leading to a whirlwind of historical reenactments where everyone pretends to be a 19th-century artist. Spoiler: they won't make it past the costume fitting.. Fact: Portrait miniatures used to be the Instagram of the 18th century—who needed filters when you could just hire a painter?.
• Headline: Jobless, Divorced, on Probation; a Pandemic Hobby Turned His Life Around. Impact: Danny Cortes's pandemic hobby success story will inspire countless others to turn their hobbies into careers, leading to a future where everyone is a self-proclaimed entrepreneur—because who needs stability when you have a craft corner?. Fact: During a pandemic, the phrase 'I took up knitting' became the new 'I found myself'—because nothing says self-discovery like a hand-knit sweater that you’ll never wear..