APRIL 22, 2023

Full News Archive

• Headline: SoFi's Unconventional Loan Repayment Lawsuit. Impact: SoFi's lawsuit to speed up student loan repayments led to a surge in conspiracy theories claiming that banks are secretly run by time-traveling wizards who hate education. As a result, a new trend emerged where students began wearing wizard hats to class, believing it would help them cast spells on their loans.. Fact: SoFi's name is short for 'Social Finance,' which sounds great until you realize they also seem to have a PhD in creating panic over student debts..
• Headline: The Menominee Tribe's Sustainable Logging. Impact: The Menominee tribe's sustainable logging practices were so successful that they eventually inspired a worldwide movement. This led to an unprecedented shortage of loggers, prompting a bizarre reality TV show called 'Logger Island' where unemployed loggers compete to find the last standing tree and hug it.. Fact: The Menominee have been logging sustainably for 160 years, which is about as long as the average person takes to find their keys in the morning..
• Headline: Global Interests Rise Amid Sudan Conflict. Impact: As countries scramble for advantages in Sudan, a butterfly flapped its wings, resulting in a highly lucrative black market for map-making services. Businesses started popping up everywhere offering 'Strategic Land Analysis,' which was just a fancy way of saying they had a really good GPS.. Fact: Sudan is not only rich in natural resources but also in the number of nations that want to take advantage of those resources, making it the world's most popular game of geopolitical musical chairs..
• Headline: An Outsider Takes on Ireland, From Inside a Plastic Bag. Impact: The podcaster's unique approach of hiding behind a plastic bag led to an unexpected trend where influencers began using bizarre disguises to speak their minds. This culminated in a bizarre festival where people dressed as household items to express their opinions on domestic issues.. Fact: The Rubberbandits' method of 'hiding in plain sight' is basically the same tactic employed by every awkward teenager at a school dance..
• Headline: Russia’s Technocrats Embraced the West, Then Enabled Putin’s War. Impact: The technocrats' embrace of the West created a paradox where they ended up accidentally introducing Western-style brunch culture to Russia. This resulted in a frenzy for avocado toast that left the economy in a state of delicious chaos.. Fact: Putin's economy may be afloat, but it's rumored that every time someone orders a latte in Moscow, an oligarch loses a dollar..