FEBRUARY 7, 2021

Full News Archive

• Headline: Victor Rivera's Controversial Tenure Explained. Impact: If Victor Rivera had faced justice, perhaps the phrase 'Nobody Tells Daddy No' would be a trending hashtag for accountability instead of a cautionary tale. Who knew power could corrupt more than just a few bank accounts?. Fact: Did you know that the homeless crisis in New York City has been around long enough to have its own social security number? It’s been thriving while some individuals cash in on it!.
• Headline: Dolly Parton's '9 to 5' Gets a Revamp. Impact: This ad might just cause a time paradox where Dolly Parton travels to 2023 just to slap the executives who thought 'hustle culture' was more empowering than her original anthem. The timeline is now full of overworked individuals who hate their jobs even more!. Fact: Fun Fact: Dolly Parton's original '9 to 5' was actually about the struggles of working women, not a celebration of their exhaustion. Who knew we needed to celebrate burnout?.
• Headline: The Mushrooms Will Survive Us. Impact: If mushrooms can survive in our ruined world, they may eventually evolve into a superior life form that decides to take over, leading to a future where we’re all just their pets. Bow before your fungal overlords!. Fact: Fun Fact: Mushrooms can actually communicate with each other through underground networks. So, if you feel like you're being judged by a mushroom, you probably are!.
• Headline: When Silver Linings Don’t Cut It, Honesty Helps. Impact: Suleika Jaouad's story might inspire a wave of honesty in memoir writing, leading to a future where everyone feels the need to document their drama, turning social media into an endless therapy session. Welcome to the age of the overshare!. Fact: Did you know that memoirs are like the social media of the past? They were just as dramatic, but at least you didn’t have to scroll through them for hours to find the good parts!.