DECEMBER 5, 2020

Full News Archive

• Headline: Political Turmoil Unfolds in Georgia. Impact: If only Trump had decided to go to an ice cream shop instead, Georgia might have turned into a peaceful utopia. But alas, he showed up, and now we have political memes for generations.. Fact: Did you know that Georgia peaches have more political influence than some senators? It's true. They just don't have a Twitter account yet..
• Headline: COVID-19 Surge Hits the U.S. Hardest. Impact: The pandemic's uneven toll led to a worldwide conspiracy theory that the virus was just a really bad social experiment by Netflix to see how long people could stay indoors without losing their minds.. Fact: Fun fact: The only thing scarier than the virus was the sudden realization that you had to face your own cooking skills..
• Headline: Japan’s Asteroid Mission Concludes in Australia. Impact: Japan's asteroid quest may have inadvertently inspired future generations to pursue space exploration, proving that even rocks from space can be more interesting than most reality TV shows.. Fact: Did you know that if you put all the asteroids together, they’d probably still be more organized than your sock drawer?.
• Headline: Republicans Pushed to Restrict Voting. Millions of Americans Pushed Back.. Impact: The push for voting rights sparked a revolution where Americans collectively decided that democracy was worth fighting for, leading to the eventual rise of a new political party: The United States of Awakened Citizens.. Fact: Did you know that voting is the only time you can yell at the government without getting arrested? Unless you do it while voting, then it’s just awkward..
• Headline: Candice Bergen, Woman Who’s Had It All. Impact: Candice Bergen's life story is so rich that it might just be the reason why Hollywood decided to make biopics about everyone, including that one guy who invented the paperclip.. Fact: Did you know that Candice Bergen once dated a ventriloquist? Talk about a relationship full of 'unspoken' issues!.