SEPTEMBER 11, 2020

Full News Archive

• Headline: Partisan Stalemate Delays Pandemic Recovery Package. Impact: Had the stimulus passed, it could have led to a sudden boom in the economy, resulting in a wave of new businesses. Fast forward a decade, and we'd have a thriving 'Startup Paradise' where even your grandma would be pitching her knitted sweater line. Alas, the ripple turned into a splash of disappointment.. Fact: Did you know that arguing about stimulus packages is basically Congress's version of a family feud? Just without the fun games and with way more yelling..
• Headline: Exploring Planet Nine's Mysterious Nature. Impact: If it turns out there is a black hole in our backyard, we could end up with a new tourist attraction. Imagine the signs: 'Visit the Black Hole! It might swallow you whole, but at least you won't have to pay for parking!'. Fact: Did you know black holes are like the universe's vacuum cleaners? Only instead of dirt, they suck in everything, including hopes, dreams, and the occasional unsuspecting star..
• Headline: The Secret History of America’s Only WWII Refugee Camp. Impact: This camp served as a beacon of hope during a dark time. The stories of those refugees could inspire countless films and books, leading to a resurgence in historical dramas that make you cry into your popcorn while pondering humanity's resilience.. Fact: Did you know that the refugees at this camp were probably hoping for a better life while also wondering why they didn't just get a subscription to Netflix instead?.
• Headline: The Other Way Covid Will Kill: Hunger. Impact: The rise in food insecurity due to Covid could reshape global agricultural policies for years to come. Imagine a future where governments finally prioritize sustainable farming—because who knew that feeding people was actually a good idea?. Fact: Did you know that hunger is a far more effective killer than any virus? It's almost like we should have prioritized food security all along. Just a thought!.