JULY 20, 2020

Full News Archive

• Headline: Covid Contrarians and Their Viral Arguments. Impact: The viral spread of Covid contrarianism led to a series of bizarre online movements, including a group that believes wearing socks on your hands boosts immunity. This has since sparked a fashion trend in sock hand-wear, causing a minor sock shortage in 2025.. Fact: Did you know that the term 'Covid contrarian' was almost a name for a new reality TV show? It would have involved people arguing over who could make the most absurd health claims while wearing a mask made of spaghetti..
• Headline: Pandemic-Ready Europe: A False Sense of Security. Impact: Europe's misplaced confidence led to a decade-long debate about how to prepare for future pandemics, resulting in the invention of a ‘Pandemic Preparedness Bingo’ game. The game includes squares for 'stockpile toilet paper' and 'panic buy hand sanitizer'.. Fact: Fun fact: 'Pride' was the original name for the Eurozone's backup plan, but they changed it to 'complacency' after realizing it sounded too optimistic..
• Headline: Corporate Debt Surge Amidst Market Instability. Impact: The borrowing binge triggered a global shortage of credit cards, leading to the invention of barter-based economies in major cities. People began trading handmade dog sweaters for artisanal coffee, proving that even in debt, humans can be ridiculous.. Fact: Did you know that the Federal Reserve once considered launching a 'Borrow Responsibly' campaign, but decided it was too much like asking kids to eat their vegetables?.
• Headline: ‘Less Optimistic’ and ‘More Cautious’: Top C.E.O.s Fret as Virus Cases Rise. Impact: The anxiety of C.E.O.s about the virus led to an explosion of corporate wellness programs that included mandatory yoga sessions and 'mandatory fun' days, which ironically made everyone dread going to work even more.. Fact: Did you know that the phrase 'less optimistic and more cautious' was actually the title of a self-help book that never sold a single copy? Apparently, nobody wanted to buy into a future of pessimism..