APRIL 27, 2019

Full News Archive

• Headline: Bicycle Town's Boom and Bust. Impact: The bike-sharing boom in Wangqingtuo led to an influx of tourists, which in turn sparked a local coffee shop craze. Unfortunately, this also resulted in a nationwide shortage of baristas, consequently causing a coffee war that ended in a series of bitterly fought latte art competitions.. Fact: Bike-sharing in China is so popular that some towns have more bicycles than residents. Just imagine the awkwardness of finding your bike among 50 others that all look exactly the same!.
• Headline: Debate on Admissions at Stuyvesant High School. Impact: The debate over admissions at elite schools has led to an unexpected rise in DIY education initiatives. Fast forward a few decades, and we find a generation of self-taught geniuses who can recite Shakespeare while coding an app to track their cat's mood swings.. Fact: Stuyvesant is so exclusive that if you don’t have a 99th percentile score, you might as well apply to Hogwarts instead!.
• Headline: Apple Enforces App Store Changes. Impact: Apple's crackdown on addiction-fighting apps inadvertently sparked a revolution in digital detox retreats. Now, instead of fighting your phone addiction, you can pay a premium to sit in silence with fellow 'detoxers' while staring at the wall—it's all the rage!. Fact: Isn't it ironic that Apple, the company that made us addicted to our phones, is now trying to save us from them? It’s like a drug dealer starting a rehab center!.
• Headline: The Raisin Situation. Impact: The man's attempt to reform the raisin industry led to the unexpected creation of a 'Raisin Liberation Front.' This group now advocates for the rights of raisins everywhere, resulting in a national day of protest every April 1st. Spoiler alert: it's still a joke.. Fact: Did you know that raisins are just grapes that lost their will to live? Talk about a fruit with a serious existential crisis!.
• Headline: Guantánamo Bay as Nursing Home: Military Envisions Hospice Care as Terrorism Suspects Age. Impact: The idea of using Guantánamo Bay as a nursing home has sparked a global conversation about elder care in extreme circumstances. This has inspired a new reality show called 'Survivor: Retirement Home Edition,' where contestants must outlive each other to win a lifetime supply of Ensure.. Fact: It's a heavy thought that some of the world’s most notorious detainees may end up sharing bingo cards. Who knew that aging could lead to such strange bedfellows?.