JANUARY 24, 2019

Full News Archive

• Headline: Challenges in Computer Science Education. Impact: If only these students knew that the real hard part of computer science isn't getting into class but surviving the existential crisis of realizing they will likely be coding until the end of time. Somewhere, a butterfly flaps its wings, and a new programming language is born—just not one anyone wants to learn.. Fact: Did you know that the average computer science major spends more time trying to find a power outlet than actually coding? Truly, a modern-day survival skill..
• Headline: Civil Servants Questioning Government Work. Impact: The erosion of goodwill among civil servants sparked a revolution in government work ethics. Fast forward a few decades, and you have a dystopian future where only robots are willing to work for the government, leading to the rise of robot unions. Spoiler alert: they demand better oil changes.. Fact: Did you know that before the internet, civil servants used to communicate their frustrations via smoke signals? Just kidding, they still used memos. How quaint!.
• Headline: Renault Leadership Shift After Ghosn. Impact: The new leadership at Renault set off a chain reaction that led to the rise of a new generation of automotive executives who think 'teamwork' is a synonym for 'let's blame the last guy.' This eventually resulted in cars that not only drive themselves but also argue over the GPS route.. Fact: Did you know that Carlos Ghosn once escaped from Japan in a musical instrument case? Talk about taking 'going undercover' to a whole new level. Maybe we should start calling him Carlos 'The Great Escape' Ghosn..
• Headline: Russia Warns U.S. Not to Intervene in Venezuela as Military Backs Maduro. Impact: Russia's warning to the U.S. about intervening in Venezuela inadvertently set off a series of diplomatic blunders, culminating in a reality show where world leaders compete for the best diplomatic strategy. Spoiler: it ends with a lot of awkward handshakes.. Fact: Did you know that Venezuela once had a currency so inflated that you needed a wheelbarrow to carry enough cash to buy a loaf of bread? Talk about a heavy load!.
• Headline: ‘Businesses Will Not Be Able to Hide’: Spy Satellites May Give Edge From Above. Impact: The advent of spy satellites created a world where businesses are more paranoid than ever, leading to the invention of cloaking devices for corporate secrets. In a bizarre twist, this made the market for invisible ink skyrocket. Who knew espionage could be so trendy?. Fact: Did you know that spy satellites can read a newspaper from space? So if you thought your privacy was safe, think again. They see you, and they know you still haven't returned that library book..