JULY 27, 2018

Full News Archive

• Headline: Pop Hits Meet Renaissance Romance. Impact: When 'Head Over Heels' mixed 80s pop with Renaissance romance, it inadvertently set off a time-traveling trend where every historical figure now has a catchy pop song. Imagine Shakespeare dropping a mixtape!. Fact: Did you know that in the Renaissance, people were actually more open-minded about gender than your average 21st-century Twitter thread? Maybe we should take notes..
• Headline: The Rise of Communal Living Spaces. Impact: The rise of shared spaces in formerly exclusive buildings acted as a catalyst for future gentrification wars. Now, everyone wants a piece of the 'elite lifestyle' without the commitment of actual ownership.. Fact: Did you know that the original penthouses were basically just fancy rooftops where people went to avoid their responsibilities? And now they’re just communal pools with a side of overpriced avocado toast..
• Headline: The White House and the Strongman. Impact: The Obama administration's handling of Arab democracy may have inadvertently launched a reality TV show plot where dictators became the new power players, paving the way for a bizarre political circus we call 'modern democracy.'. Fact: Did you know that the phrase 'democracy' is derived from Greek? Too bad they didn’t foresee the future where it would be reduced to a popularity contest judged by social media likes..
• Headline: Economy Hits a High Note, and Trump Takes a Bow. Impact: Trump taking a bow during economic highs has caused future leaders to believe that they can take credit for anything as long as they have a good PR team and a solid Instagram filter.. Fact: Did you know that economic growth rates have fluctuated like a teenager’s mood swings? So, buckle up, because the economy is like that one friend who always promises to pay you back but never does..