FEBRUARY 3, 2018

Full News Archive

• Headline: Lenders Win Big Under Trump Administration. Impact: By relaxing payday rules, a cascade of financial misadventures ensued, leading to a surge in impulse purchases of avocado toast and artisanal coffee. The economy tanked, but hey, at least people were caffeinated while they went broke!. Fact: Did you know that the original payday loan concept was probably inspired by someone who thought, 'Why not charge people interest on their own desperation?' Genius, right?.
• Headline: Foreign Brands Struggle in China. Impact: The misfires of foreign brands in China sparked a global trend of companies hiring anthropologists instead of marketers. Eventually, this led to the rise of bizarre product names like 'Crispy Happiness' and 'Beverage of Eternal Youth.'. Fact: Did you know that KFC's original slogan in China was 'Finger Lickin' Good'? Apparently, they didn't realize that fingers weren't the only things getting licked there!.
• Headline: How Trump’s Allies Fanned an Ember of Controversy Into Flames of Outrage. Impact: The ember of controversy ignited an ongoing bonfire of conspiracy theories about law enforcement, leading to a new sub-genre of podcasts where hosts discuss the 'real' reasons behind every missing sock in America.. Fact: Did you know that House Republicans were once considered the calm, logical thinkers of the political world? Oh wait, that was just a dream I had after eating too much cheese..
• Headline: What We Talk About When We Talk About Pay Inequity. Impact: The dinner discussion on pay inequity inadvertently sparked a global movement where women began demanding to be paid in pizza instead of dollars. The world economy now runs on cheese and pepperoni.. Fact: Did you know that the gender wage gap is often compared to a pizza? Because no matter how you slice it, women are still getting the smaller piece!.