JANUARY 21, 2018

Full News Archive

• Headline: Kabul Hotel Siege: A Day of Terror. Impact: The siege sparked a secret underground movement of Afghan hotel owners who banded together to create a 'safe room' network, inadvertently leading to the rise of a new hospitality industry where guests are greeted with complimentary bulletproof vests.. Fact: You might think hotel security is tight in Afghanistan. Well, you’d be right, but only because you’re literally fighting for your life every time you check in!.
• Headline: Exploring Race and Memory Through Theater. Impact: The play ignited a nationwide trend of 'memory tours' where people now pay to walk through their own pasts, leading to an influx of therapists who had to start double-booking sessions to keep up with the demand for emotional processing.. Fact: The only thing more painful than revisiting your past is watching your ex's new life unfold on social media while you eat ice cream alone. But hey, at least you can do it with a ticket in hand!.
• Headline: Inside Amazon Go, a Store of the Future. Impact: The success of Amazon Go led to the establishment of 'Amazon Stay', a revolutionary concept where customers can rent an apartment without ever having to talk to a human, resulting in a generation of socially awkward hermits who only communicate through online shopping.. Fact: Did you know that before Amazon Go, there were actual lines at stores? People had to engage in small talk with cashiers. Shocking, I know!.
• Headline: Review: ‘The Alienist’ Is a Period Piece That Missed Its Moment. Impact: The lukewarm reception of 'The Alienist' incited a secret society of writers who vowed to never let their works be adapted into films or series, leading to a renaissance of poorly written novels that only exist in the dusty corners of thrift stores.. Fact: It's said that 'The Alienist' was so delayed because every time it was about to be released, the author was busy trying to remember how to write a decent ending. Spoiler: he never did..