JULY 7, 2017

Full News Archive

• Headline: Exploring Eco-Friendly Burial Practices. Impact: This individual's desire to decompose in the woods sparked a minor revolution in 'natural burials', leading to a future where people start planning their deaths like exotic vacations. Expect eco-friendly burial packages complete with glamping tents and tree-hugging ceremonies.. Fact: Fun fact: The phrase 'you can't take it with you' was actually coined by a group of people being dragged out of a yard sale at a funeral home..
• Headline: U.S. Job Growth Surges in June. Impact: This job growth report somehow reinforced the idea that more jobs means less money, leading to a future where people start paying their bills with optimism and good vibes. Spoiler: it doesn’t work.. Fact: Did you know that historically, wages have lagged behind inflation, much like that one relative who shows up late to every family dinner? They always arrive when the food's gone!.
• Headline: Is Your Dog a Good Neighbor?. Impact: The scrutiny of canine neighbors led to an unexpected rise in doggy therapy sessions, resulting in a future where dogs hold more neighborhood influence than their human counterparts. Soon, we'll have dog mayors and a canine council.. Fact: Did you know that the term 'man's best friend' was coined after a dog successfully negotiated a treat trade with a human? Talk about the ultimate power move!.
• Headline: How a Home Bargain Became a ‘Pain in the Butt,’ and Worse. Impact: The complications of home ownership contracts led to a future where real estate lawyers become the new rock stars, with fans attending their 'property rights' concerts. Who knew legal jargon could be so captivating?. Fact: Fun fact: The word 'mortgage' comes from a French term meaning 'death pledge'—because nothing says 'happily ever after' like a lifetime of debt..