JUNE 12, 2017

Full News Archive

• Headline: Watergate vs. Trump Era Narratives. Impact: If Watergate had happened in the Trump era, we might have seen a reality show titled 'Keeping Up with the Cover-ups.' The constant reinterpretation of facts could have led to a new genre of political thrillers where the plot twists are just people tweeting wildly.. Fact: Did you know that in the Watergate scandal, the actual break-in was just the tip of the iceberg? It’s like a bad sequel where the follow-up is even worse than the original..
• Headline: Britain's Economic Challenges During Brexit. Impact: The economic pinch from Brexit could lead to a strange alternate timeline where Britons start hoarding tea and biscuits, convinced it’s the ultimate currency. Who knew crumpets would become the gold standard?. Fact: Fun fact: The word 'Brexit' was coined in 2012. Just think, if they had called it 'Britain's Big Bye-Bye,' maybe they would have reconsidered!.
• Headline: Penguins Repeat as Stanley Cup Champions. Impact: The Penguins winning the Stanley Cup could inspire a new trend in animal mascots taking over professional sports management. Who knows, maybe in 20 years we’ll see a raccoon as a general manager?. Fact: Sidney Crosby is known as 'The Next One'—which is ironic because he’s actually the one everyone keeps talking about. Guess he just skipped the whole 'previous' part!.
• Headline: An Uneven Night for Kevin Spacey as Tonys Host. Impact: Kevin Spacey hosting the Tonys might lead to an alternate universe where every award show is hosted by someone who’s had a controversial past. Imagine the Oscar nominations—'Best Performance by a Disgraced Celebrity!'. Fact: Did you know the Tonys are more about Broadway insiders than the general public? It’s like a secret club, but instead of a password, you have to know the choreography to a show tune..
• Headline: Give Baseball Scouts a (Perfect) 80 for Tradition. Impact: Baseball scouts using the 20 to 80 scale could eventually lead to a bizarre future where people rate everyday skills like cooking or knitting on the same scale. 'Your casserole is a solid 70, but that scarf? A 40 at best.'. Fact: Branch Rickey's scale is so quirky it’s almost like a hipster rating—'This player is so artisanal, he’s got a 75 on the craft beer scale of baseball!'.