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HEADLINES ON March 15, 2017
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- Headline: Gorsuch's Connections with Billionaire Anschutz. Impact: Had Gorsuch not rubbed elbows with Anschutz, perhaps America's judicial system would have remained blissfully unaware of the multi-billion dollar influence, and we might have ended up with a less biased Supreme Court, or just a different brand of bias altogether.. Fact: Did you know that the Supreme Court has more ties to billionaires than a fancy gala? It's basically the elite version of a high school reunion, just with less beer and more legal jargon..
- Headline: Trump's 2005 Tax Return Leaked Details. Impact: Trump's tax write-offs could spark a new trend of aspiring moguls claiming losses on their imaginary businesses, leading to a renaissance of 'entrepreneurs' who are really just really good at losing money.. Fact: Did you know that writing off losses is almost as satisfying as clearing your browser history? It’s like a fiscal cleanse!.
- Headline: Is Gascony the Most Delicious Corner of France?. Impact: If Gascony is deemed the most delicious corner of France, it could trigger a global culinary migration, with foodies abandoning their mundane lives to pursue truffle-filled dreams, leading to a shortage of avocados back home.. Fact: Did you know that the French have a saying: 'You are what you eat'? So if you’re eating Gascon cuisine, does that make you a duck confit? Asking for a friend..