FEBRUARY 19, 2017

Full News Archive

• Headline: Arts Groups Prepare for Funding Cuts. Impact: If arts funding had been cut, perhaps the Renaissance would have been just a really long lunch break instead of a cultural explosion. Who knows? Maybe we'd all be stuck watching paint dry instead of appreciating it.. Fact: Did you know that without public funding, we might have never seen the birth of interpretive dance? Imagine a world where the only dance form was the Macarena!.
• Headline: Iraq Launches Offensive Against ISIS in Mosul. Impact: The battle for Mosul not only impacted Iraq but also influenced global strategies against ISIS, leading to a game of geopolitical chess where each move had more collateral damage than a toddler with a crayon.. Fact: It's estimated that around 1 million people were displaced during the battle. That’s a sizable crowd, enough to make a concert feel like a cozy gathering..
• Headline: Texas Oil Fields Adapt to New Technology. Impact: The oil industry's pivot to technology might have saved them a few bucks, but it also contributed to a future filled with robots taking over jobs. All hail our robotic overlords, who will probably still need oil for their existential crises.. Fact: In the 1980s, the oil industry was so flush with cash they could have bought a small country. Now they’re just buying algorithms. Progress!.
• Headline: Kraft Heinz Withdraws $143 Billion Offer to Merge With Unilever. Impact: Kraft Heinz’s merger attempt flopping meant that the world would not be subjected to a future where ketchup could have been a luxury item, and grocery stores would be filled with even more confusing packaging.. Fact: Unilever owns over 400 brands. Imagine trying to find the right one after a breakup. You'd need a map just to navigate the aisle!.