JANUARY 14, 2017

Full News Archive

• Headline: Guyana's Transformative Oil Discovery. Impact: If Guyana becomes a top oil producer, it might trigger a global oil rush that leads to a 'race to the bottom' for environmental standards. In 50 years, we could be living in a post-apocalyptic world where the only currency is bottled water and sunscreen.. Fact: Guyana's national motto is 'One People, One Nation, One Destiny.' Ironically, it might soon be 'One Oil, One Rush, One Environmental Disaster.'.
• Headline: Ethics Office Controversy Sparks Republican Debate. Impact: This ethical debate might inspire a new reality show called 'The Ethical Dilemma,' where politicians compete to see who can twist the truth the most creatively. Spoiler: Everyone wins, but the public loses.. Fact: Walter M. Shaub Jr. once served as the Director of the U.S. Office of Government Ethics. Talk about a job that requires a strong stomach and a good sense of humor!.
• Headline: Nike's Bold Move for LeBron 14 Launch. Impact: By bypassing traditional shoe stores, Nike could inadvertently spark a new trend in DIY shoe-making. In 20 years, we might see hipsters crafting their own footwear from recycled materials, while LeBron’s shoes become a rare collector's item.. Fact: Michael Jordan's shoes are so popular that they could probably be used as a form of currency in the future. Forget Bitcoin; it's all about Air Jordans!.
• Headline: Nicol David, the Serena Williams of Squash, Blends in With U.S. Crowds. Impact: Nicol David's presence in the U.S. could lead to squash becoming the next big American sport, resulting in an influx of hipster squash clubs. In 30 years, we might see people debating the merits of organic squash racquets.. Fact: Nicol David is often referred to as the 'greatest female squash player of all time.' Meanwhile, most of us struggle to even find a squash court!.
• Headline: In the Shopping Cart of a Food Stamp Household: Lots of Soda. Impact: This study on food stamp households could lead to a national soda shortage, sparking a black market for sugary drinks. Imagine a dystopian future where soda is traded like gold bars!. Fact: Studies show that people on food stamps buy soda, but honestly, who can resist a fizzy beverage? It's like the only joy in a shopping cart full of canned beans!.