JANUARY 6, 2017

Full News Archive

• Headline: Understanding Trump's Economic Predictions. Impact: Trump's economic observations set off a chain reaction where every tweet became a market prediction, leading to the creation of a new profession: 'Twitter Economists.' Sadly, they all went broke because their predictions were based more on emojis than data.. Fact: Fun fact: Economic disasters often come with a side of ice cream. It's a coping mechanism for economists who have to watch their predictions go down the drain..
• Headline: Kiera Duffy's Journey as Bess. Impact: Kiera Duffy's portrayal of Bess sparked a new trend in operatic roles, where every soprano felt the need to undergo extreme training regimens, leading to a bizarre twist where singers were also doubling as personal trainers. 'Be fit or be flat' became the slogan of the opera world.. Fact: Did you know that rigorous training for opera can lead to singers developing impressive abs? Unfortunately, they are still overshadowed by their vocal prowess—abs don’t win you a Grammy!.
• Headline: Which Michelle Obama Will We Get When She Leaves the White House?. Impact: Michelle Obama's post-White House persona inspired a wave of 'influencers' who aimed to be the next 'mom in chief,' but instead just ended up hula-hooping in their backyards while trying to sell detox tea. It was a glorious, if misguided, attempt at legacy.. Fact: Did you know that Michelle Obama’s ability to charm late-night hosts led to a secret society of comedians who meet quarterly to discuss how to win her approval? Spoiler: It involves lots of kale..