JULY 22, 2016

Full News Archive

• Headline: F.C.C. Chooses Swedish Telecom for US Routing. Impact: The decision to let a Swedish company run the American phone routing system triggered a series of events leading to a nationwide obsession with IKEA furniture, as citizens mistakenly believed they could assemble their own phone systems like a bookshelf.. Fact: Did you know that the Swedish word for 'telephone' is 'telefon'? Just imagine if the Swedes had decided to call it something like 'snabbprat'— we'd all be just a bit more confused..
• Headline: Trump's Silence Amid Voter Concerns. Impact: Trump's refusal to escape his caricature solidified his image as the ultimate reality TV star, paving the way for future politicians to treat debates like episodes of 'Survivor'— where the only goal is to outlast the competition.. Fact: Did you know that Donald Trump once had a cameo in 'Home Alone 2'? Clearly, he’s been practicing for his role as a political figure for decades now..
• Headline: Assisting Seniors with Downsizing Needs. Impact: The rise of move managers for the elderly resulted in a new trend of 'senior minimalist retreats', where retirees now spend their golden years in cozy, clutter-free communes, eating organic kale and practicing yoga.. Fact: Did you know that the average American accumulates 102 items per year? If only we could convince everyone to downsize as gracefully as grandma does..
• Headline: Skinny and 119 Pounds, but With the Health Hallmarks of Obesity. Impact: The discovery of thin patients with obesity traits led to a surge in medical research, which eventually resulted in the invention of a new diet fad: 'Skinny Obesity Diet'— a plan where you eat cake while insisting you're just 'fluffy'.. Fact: Did you know that the body can hold onto fat even if you're skinny? It's like a bad relationship— no matter how hard you try, it just won't let go..
• Headline: Buy It With Cash, Mortgage It Later. Impact: The trend of buying homes with cash and mortgaging later sparked a national fascination with financial gymnastics, leading to a new reality show, 'Flip or Flop: Mortgage Edition', where contestants try to outsmart their own budgets.. Fact: Did you know that paying cash for a home can save you money on interest? But who needs savings when you can live on the edge of financial chaos?.