DECEMBER 28, 2015

Full News Archive

• Headline: Lasers and Antiquities Preservation Against ISIS. Impact: If we hadn't laser-etched those ancient ruins, a future generation might have thought that the pyramids were built by aliens. Thank goodness for technology, or the next conspiracy theory would involve stone blocks and UFOs.. Fact: Did you know that if you photograph a sunset with a laser, the sunset will actually be jealous because it can't preserve itself like those antiquities?.
• Headline: Drone Laws: Federal vs. Local Regulations. Impact: The clash between drone laws and local regulations could lead to the first ever drone war, where local towns fight the FAA with paper airplanes and angry citizen petitions. Who knew sky wars would be the next frontier in political disputes?. Fact: Fun fact: Local lawmakers are just trying to protect their backyard barbecues from being surveyed by flying robots. Can't have the neighbors knowing what you're grilling!.
• Headline: Mattel's Bold Move with Toy Innovation. Impact: If Barbie and Bugs succeed, we may eventually see a Barbie that can build a bug-catching empire, leading to a future where kids are more interested in pest control than astronaut careers. Thanks, Mattel, for revolutionizing childhood aspirations!. Fact: Did you know that Barbie once had a bug collection? It's true! She just never mentioned it because she didn't want to reveal her secret life as an entomologist..
• Headline: In Hollywood, a Year of Mining the Past for Box-Office Gold. Impact: Hollywood’s obsession with mining the past could result in a future where all movies are just remakes of remakes, and we'll be stuck watching 'Jurassic Park: The Fifth Resurrection'. At least the popcorn will still be good.. Fact: Did you know that Hollywood executives are working on a sequel to the sequel of the prequel of a movie that was originally based on a book? Yeah, it's that serious..
• Headline: Kevin Love’s Signature Pass Is Inspired by the Past. Impact: Kevin Love’s signature pass may inspire a new generation of basketball players to trace their moves back to their great-grandparents, resulting in a bizarre game where every play has a historical reference. Talk about a family tree on the court!. Fact: Fun fact: Love's pass is so legendary that it might just become a historical landmark one day—much like his father's questionable fashion choices from the '70s..