JUNE 9, 2015

Full News Archive

• Headline: Regulators Influence Deutsche Bank Leadership Changes. Impact: If Deutsche Bank's leadership had not been shaken up, perhaps we'd be living in a world where banking crises were just quirky historical anecdotes, rather than daily news. Or maybe we'd just have a different set of bankers to complain about. Either way, buckle up for the ride!. Fact: The only thing more tumultuous than banking leadership is the stock market during a surprise celebrity breakup. Just think about it!.
• Headline: MERS Virus Spread in South Korea. Impact: Had the MERS virus not found its perfect breeding ground, South Korea might have avoided a public health panic, and we could have been spared endless discussions about the merits of hand sanitizer. Instead, everyone now is a germophobe. Thanks, MERS!. Fact: MERS stands for Middle East Respiratory Syndrome. But honestly, it might as well stand for 'Make Everyone Really Scared.'.
• Headline: The King’s the Thing, Not the Play, for an Actor Who Would Be Lear. Impact: If Edward Petherbridge had played King Lear, we might have had a Shakespearean renaissance! Instead, we’re left with 'My Perfect Mind,' which is probably an apt title for every actor's thoughts on their career choices.. Fact: King Lear is one of Shakespeare's most tragic characters. If only he had a good agent, he might have gotten a better script!.
• Headline: Marco Rubio’s Career Bedeviled by Financial Struggles. Impact: Rubio’s financial woes could inspire a new wave of politicians to embrace transparency, or it could just lead to more politicians hiding their finances behind a veil of smoke and mirrors. Ah, democracy!. Fact: Politicians and financial struggles go together like peanut butter and jelly—deliciously sticky and usually a mess by the time it’s over!.