MAY 10, 2015

Full News Archive

• Headline: Campus Divestment Debates Spark Tensions. Impact: This debate inadvertently led to the creation of campus clubs focused on 'Finding Common Ground,' which ultimately resulted in the formation of the world's first intergalactic peace conference in 3042, where humans and aliens attempted to understand each other through interpretive dance.. Fact: Did you know that the phrase 'driving a wedge' is literally how carpenters created the first wooden shoes? Talk about a fashion statement!.
• Headline: Late-Night TV's New Era Begins. Impact: Letterman's departure caused a ripple effect that led to the rise of a new genre: 'Late Night ASMR,' where hosts whisper their monologues and the audience falls asleep instead of laughing.. Fact: Did you know that David Letterman once had a pet squirrel named 'Davey'? Unfortunately, Davey was not available for comment on this monumental change..
• Headline: Ad Dollars Shift from TV to Digital Media. Impact: The decline of traditional television led to a bizarre future where people gathered around holographic projections of their favorite shows, leading to the popularization of 'binge watching' as the new Olympic sport.. Fact: Did you know that Netflix was originally a mail-order DVD service? Imagine waiting for a DVD to arrive while your neighbor already pirated it—classic!.
• Headline: Uber Funding Talks Highlight the Speedy Pace of Investments. Impact: Uber's fundraising frenzy inadvertently sparked a trend where every startup began ending their pitches with 'and also we have a dog!' resulting in a wave of pet-friendly tech companies and a national obsession with office puppies.. Fact: Did you know that Uber's first car was actually a bicycle? Just imagine the chaos of trying to fit a passenger and a driver on a single bike!.
• Headline: Review: PC Music and Sophie in a High-Concept Extravaganza at BRIC House. Impact: The event at BRIC House inspired a future generation of artists to combine art and technology in increasingly bizarre ways, including a performance art piece where attendees were required to wear VR headsets and listen to the sounds of a toaster.. Fact: Did you know that Sophie has a knack for creating sounds that make you feel like you're being transported to an alternate universe? Just don't ask her to describe it—she's too busy creating!.