MARCH 1, 2015

Full News Archive

• Headline: G.O.P. Fundraising in Exclusive Venues. Impact: This lavish gathering of wealthy donors ultimately led to the rise of candidates who believe that the average American's voice can be drowned out by a yacht party's sound system. Consequently, the phrase 'money talks' became a national anthem, leading to the eventual invention of the political goldfish bowl where only the ultra-rich could swim.. Fact: Did you know that the Supreme Court's Citizens United decision didn't just unleash cash; it also unleashed a plethora of political ads that could make even a clam feel overwhelmed? Who knew democracy could be so... expensive?.
• Headline: Parents and Students Reject Common Core Tests. Impact: As parents and students opted out, a new underground movement began, where kids devised creative ways to avoid testing, such as pretending to be 'allergic' to pencils. This led to a nationwide trend of 'alternative education', where students learned about life through TikTok instead of textbooks.. Fact: Fun fact: opting out of standardized tests has become so trendy that it's the only time students can proudly declare they 'didn't study' and mean it!.
• Headline: Challenges of Afghan Policewomen. Impact: The struggles of Afghan policewomen became a rallying cry for women's rights worldwide, leading to an unexpected surge in superhero movies featuring female leads who fight against societal norms, proving that sometimes, a little adversity inspires a lot of Hollywood.. Fact: Did you know that the first female police officer in Afghanistan was actually a highly trained ninja? Just kidding, but wouldn’t that make for a great action film?.
• Headline: Milan Remembers John Fairchild. Impact: John Fairchild's passing led to an unexpected renaissance in the fashion world, where designers started to embrace the 'less is more' philosophy—primarily because they were too busy mourning to sketch anything elaborate.. Fact: Did you know that in Milan, the only thing more profound than a fashion week moment is the collective sigh of heartbreak over a lost fashion icon? It's practically an Olympic sport..
• Headline: Review: ‘John & Jen,’ a Revival Starring Kate Baldwin and Conor Ryan. Impact: The themes of complicated relationships in 'John & Jen' echoed through time, paving the way for countless family therapy sessions and an uptick in awkward holiday gatherings, as everyone suddenly realized their family dynamics weren't as unique as they thought.. Fact: Fun fact: 'John & Jen' is not just a musical; it's also the name of the world's most complicated family reunion, with enough drama to fuel a reality show!.