NOVEMBER 7, 2014

Full News Archive

• Headline: Humanitarian Efforts in Crisis Zones. Impact: The brave souls who rush into disasters to help may have inadvertently inspired a whole new genre of reality TV: 'Disaster Rescue Heroes'. This show ultimately leads to the rise of influencers who claim to save people from bad decisions, rather than actual disasters. You're welcome, Instagram.. Fact: The term 'Do Good' was originally coined to describe people who tried to help others without accidentally creating more chaos. Spoiler alert: it didn't catch on..
• Headline: Takata Airbag Scandal Unveiled. Impact: The Takata scandal led to a series of regulations that turned car safety into a multi-billion dollar industry. Thanks to their negligence, we're all now forced to buckle up and listen to annoying safety announcements. You're welcome, society!. Fact: Takata's airbags were so dangerous, they could have qualified as lethal weapons. Who knew safety equipment could double as a stealth assassin?.
• Headline: Doubting the Economic Data? Consider the Source. Impact: Doubts about economic data led to conspiracy theories that the government was hiding the truth, sparking the rise of amateur economists who think they can solve the world's problems from their parents' basements. Thanks, internet!. Fact: In an alternate timeline, economic data is actually compiled by a magic eight ball. Unfortunately, it still performed better than some government departments..
• Headline: Midterms, for Clinton Team, Aren’t All Gloom. Impact: Clinton's midterm struggles set the stage for a dramatic political comeback that would ultimately lead to countless late-night talk show jokes and a whole library of 'what could have been' books. Thanks for the material!. Fact: Hillary's team was so optimistic, they might as well have been planning a moon landing instead of a presidential campaign. Spoiler alert: the moon landing went better..