OCTOBER 17, 2014

Full News Archive

• Headline: Market Volatility Freezes Deal Making. Impact: This market shiver created a chain reaction where investors learned to always carry a lucky rabbit's foot, forever altering the stock market's superstitious culture. Who knew finance could be so... mystical?. Fact: Did you know that the last time the market shivered this much, a group of investment bankers tried to interpret the movements as Morse code? Spoiler alert: they weren't very good at it..
• Headline: Supreme Court Deliberates 401(k) Responsibilities. Impact: This case opened a Pandora's box of corporate liability, leading to the eventual creation of a new superhero: Captain Fiduciary! He swoops in to save employees from high fees and poor investment choices, one lawsuit at a time.. Fact: Did you know that 401(k) plans were originally designed by a group of accountants who thought 'fun' meant 'adding more complex fees'? They really nailed it, huh?.
• Headline: Carried Away by the Sights! Lights! Nights!. Impact: This Broadway revival inspired a generation of aspiring actors to believe that all they needed for success was a catchy slogan and a good pair of tap shoes. Consequently, New York became the tap dance capital of the world—who knew?. Fact: Did you know that the original version of 'On the Town' included a subplot about a lost sandwich? They cut it because it was just too cheesy..
• Headline: Bloc in Europe Starts to Balk Over Austerity. Impact: This rebellion inspired a new trend: countries throwing fiscal tantrums. Soon, politicians were seen stomping their feet and demanding more funding like children in a candy store, changing the face of European politics forever.. Fact: Fun fact: The last time a country balked at austerity measures, they accidentally started a new dance craze called 'The Fiscal Flop.' It didn't catch on as well as they hoped..