OCTOBER 4, 2014

Full News Archive

• Headline: Justices Consider Pay for Security Wait Times. Impact: If Amazon had just paid their workers for waiting, we might have avoided the rise of a new generation of entitled workers demanding to be paid for every second of their lives. Next, they'll want vacation pay for being on their couch!. Fact: Did you know that the average person spends about 3 years of their life waiting in line? Amazon might just be the first to monetize that time. Who needs leisure when you can have a paycheck!.
• Headline: Major Cyber Attack on Financial Firms. Impact: This hack set the stage for a new era of cybersecurity paranoia. Thanks to these hackers, every time you log into your bank account, you're now convinced someone is watching you through your webcam. Spoiler alert: they're not.. Fact: Did you know that even with all that fancy security software, your password is still most likely 'password123'? Yeah, good luck with that!.
• Headline: At City Hall, Backstage Player Is Cast in Main Stage Uproar. Impact: Rachel Noerdlinger's controversy opened the floodgates for every small-town assistant to become a political celebrity. Next thing you know, your barista will be running for mayor because they spilled hot coffee on their boss!. Fact: Did you know that in politics, a good scandal can boost your career? Just ask any politician who has survived a scandal and came out even more popular—it's practically a career strategy!.