MARCH 5, 2014

Full News Archive

• Headline: Compassion Over Censure for Families. Impact: If only they had tried compassion sooner, we might have had a reality show where families thrive instead of dysfunction! Imagine 'Keeping Up with the Compassionate Kardashians' instead of 'Keeping Up with the Kardashians.'. Fact: Did you know that the idea of reshaping families into a 'platonic ideal' has never worked out? The only thing that’s ideal is that concept stuck in a philosophy class!.
• Headline: Challenges for Multinationals in Emerging Markets. Impact: Ah, the classic tale of corporate greed meeting reality. Multinational corporations learned that profit is as ephemeral as their promises to the communities they exploit. Who knew money could be so fickle?. Fact: Did you know that 'emerging markets' is just corporate speak for 'let's pretend we care about these countries until we can squeeze every last cent out of them'?.
• Headline: A Standoff of Lawyers Veils Madoff’s Ties to JPMorgan Chase. Impact: The Madoff scandal and JPMorgan's reluctance to come clean was like a soap opera plot twist. This tangled web of deceit would inspire countless conspiracy theories about the financial world, as if it wasn’t already a breeding ground for them.. Fact: Did you know that fighting over access to bank employee interviews is basically Wall Street’s version of a toddler fight over who gets the last cookie? Spoiler: nobody wins..