JANUARY 24, 2014

Full News Archive

• Headline: Mary Barra's Vision for G.M. Recovery. Impact: Mary Barra's determination to revitalize GM led to a butterfly effect where car innovation surged, resulting in a future where flying cars almost became a reality, but instead, we got electric scooters that break down two blocks from home.. Fact: Did you know that if GM had a nickel for every comeback it tried to make, they could probably buy back their own stock... again?.
• Headline: Health Management Associates Billing Controversy. Impact: The alleged scheme triggered a national crisis in healthcare transparency, leading to the creation of an underground network of 'bill busters' who specialize in negotiating hospital prices, all while wearing capes.. Fact: Did you know that healthcare billing is so confusing, even the hospital administrators need a decoder ring to understand it?.
• Headline: Corporations Confront Climate Change Challenges. Impact: Coca-Cola's realization of climate change's economic impact led to the invention of the first 'eco-friendly' soda, which tasted like disappointment but was marketed as 'sustainably sourced.'. Fact: Did you know that climate change is so disruptive that even the ice in your drink might start charging rent?.
• Headline: In Rural Jails, E-Cigarettes Are a Calming Vapor. Impact: The introduction of e-cigarettes in jails sparked a nationwide trend where prisons became the unlikely innovators of vaping culture, forever changing the way we view inmates and their 'vapor lounges.'. Fact: Did you know that e-cigarettes in jails are the new 'luxury item'? Next up: gourmet coffee served in the mess hall..
• Headline: Weary, Brooding and Made for Each Other. Impact: The themes of Shanley's play inadvertently inspired a generation of relationship advice books, leading to a future where every couple thinks they can solve their problems with a dramatic monologue.. Fact: Did you know that the Irish have a unique way of brooding? It involves a lot of staring into the distance while contemplating the meaning of life and how to best avoid awkward small talk..