DECEMBER 17, 2013

Full News Archive

• Headline: Tourre Faces Penalties for Investor Fraud. Impact: Tourre’s penalties became a rallying cry for investors everywhere, leading to the inception of a new superhero: The Financial Avenger. This vigilante roams the stock market, punishing greed while wearing a cape made of shredded mortgage-backed securities.. Fact: Did you know that Tourre's first name is Fabrice? Because when you're committing financial fraud, why not add a touch of French flair?.
• Headline: Many Detect End of Line for Stimulus by the Fed. Impact: The Fed's decision to taper stimulus created a ripple effect where investors started to actually consider economic fundamentals. This bizarre phenomenon led to the rise of a new breed of economist who could predict market changes without a crystal ball—just pure, old-fashioned analysis.. Fact: Did you know that 'tapering' is just a fancy word for 'let's stop printing money like it's going out of style'? It's like a financial diet that nobody wants to follow..
• Headline: Obama’s Library, Advisers’ Dream. Impact: The battle over Obama's library planning led to a phenomenon known as 'Library Wars,' where various factions tried to outdo each other with outlandish proposals. This culminated in the first-ever presidential library designed entirely around selfie stations.. Fact: Did you know that the only thing more complex than planning a presidential library is trying to get out of a family reunion? At least with the library, you can avoid awkward conversations!.