DECEMBER 15, 2013

Full News Archive

• Headline: Bloomberg's Global Urban Planning Initiative. Impact: Bloomberg's global consulting venture led to an international obsession with urban planning, inspiring a trend where cities hired ex-mayors instead of actual urban planners. This ultimately resulted in a worldwide shortage of competent city planners and an abundance of former politicians giving unsolicited advice on how to rearrange park benches.. Fact: Did you know that consulting groups are just fancy terms for 'we'll charge you a lot so we can tell you what you already know'? It's like paying someone to give you a pep talk about cleaning your room..
• Headline: Peter O’Toole, Whose Acclaim Began With ‘Lawrence of Arabia,’ Dies at 81. Impact: The death of Peter O'Toole marked the end of an era in film, leading to a spike in dramatic monologues performed at dinner parties across the globe, as people tried to channel their inner Lawrence while arguing about the best pizza toppings.. Fact: In his later years, O'Toole claimed to have been offered the chance to play James Bond, but he turned it down for the role of 'Man in Pub' because he preferred to drink than chase villains..
• Headline: China Focusing Graft Inquiry on Ex-Official. Impact: Xi Jinping's decision to investigate a high-level official created a ripple effect in China's political landscape, leading to a new sport called 'Who's Next?' where officials eagerly speculated who might be the next victim of the graft inquiry, complete with betting pools and everything.. Fact: Isn't it fun when corruption inquiries feel like a reality show? Who needs 'Survivor' when you have 'Politician Accountability'? Spoiler alert: Nobody survives..