NOVEMBER 7, 2013

Full News Archive

• Headline: Twitter's Growth Potential Captivates Investors. Impact: If Twitter had never been valued so highly, Elon Musk might have never bought it, which means the world could have been spared a barrage of tweets about his obscure thoughts on the universe and the occasional meme about Dogecoin. The butterfly flaps its wings, and suddenly we're all knee-deep in crypto jokes.. Fact: Twitter's growth potential was so 'huge' that investors probably mistook it for a new diet fad promising to shed pounds while you sleep..
• Headline: China's Film Industry Eyes Hollywood Success. Impact: If China had managed to create a blockbuster hit in the U.S. sooner, Hollywood might have been forced to reconsider its endless stream of sequels and reboots, possibly leading to a world where original ideas actually thrived. Just imagine a reality where we were spared 'Fast & Furious 30: Space Drift.'. Fact: The last time a Chinese film made a splash in Hollywood, it was during a monsoon of remakes. Spoiler alert: the remake was not better..
• Headline: Playing With a Full Deck, and Your Head. Impact: The success of 'Nothing to Hide' could have inspired a new wave of performances where magicians reveal their secrets, leading to a world where everyone knows how to pull a rabbit from a hat but still can't figure out how to pay taxes. Who knew transparency could be so baffling?. Fact: Helder Guimarães and Derek DelGaudio are proof that you can keep an audience spellbound with absolutely no technology—just a deck of cards and some questionable life choices..
• Headline: G.O.P. Weighs Limiting Clout of Right Wing. Impact: If the G.O.P. had been successful in limiting the clout of the right wing, we might have avoided the circus that is modern politics. However, without that chaos, we likely wouldn't have the countless memes and late-night comedy gold that make us chuckle through the pain.. Fact: The Republican establishment rethinking its nominee process is like a cat trying to teach a dog to meow. Good luck with that!.