JULY 21, 2013

Full News Archive

• Headline: Leak Prosecution Under Obama Administration. Impact: The leak crackdown led to a secret society of whistleblowers forming in underground basements, crafting elaborate escape plans for future leaks. Their first mission? To leak the recipe for the perfect avocado toast.. Fact: Fun fact: the phrase 'leak like a sieve' was almost changed to 'leak like a government'..
• Headline: Westwood Leads at British Open 2010. Impact: Westwood's lead at the British Open created a ripple effect in the golf world, prompting every amateur to boast about their 'Westwood-like' abilities, despite never having played a round in their lives.. Fact: Lee Westwood once tried to bet a few rounds on himself, only to find out that the only thing more stubborn than golf fans is the weather in England..
• Headline: Some Mormons Search the Web and Find Doubt. Impact: The online search for doubt among Mormons led to a surge in Google searches about existential crises, which in turn inspired a new genre of self-help books titled 'Doubt: The New Faith'.. Fact: It's rumored that the first church-sponsored search engine was called 'Pray Search', but it never caught on because it only returned results from the Book of Mormon..
• Headline: Newark Revival Wears Orange Along the River. Impact: The Newark revival sparked a nationwide trend of urban rivers being 'reclaimed'. Soon, cities across America will be competing over who can turn their polluted waterways into trendy picnic spots. #GentrifiedRivers. Fact: The Passaic River once attempted to start a band called 'The Polluted Waters', but they only ever played one gig due to a lack of interest—and a lot of toxic waste..