MAY 13, 2013

Full News Archive

• Headline: Rangers Force Decisive Game 7 Showdown. Impact: If Derick Brassard hadn't scored that slap shot, the Rangers might have packed their bags early and the entire city of New York would have been spared a summer of heartbreak and overzealous sports commentary. Who knows, maybe Broadway would have opened a few extra shows instead? The true butterfly effect of a hockey game!. Fact: Did you know that a slap shot is often considered the most powerful shot in hockey? So, in a way, Brassard was just bringing a little more drama to the already intense playoff season—like we needed more of that in New York!.
• Headline: Times-Picayune Resumes Daily Print Publication. Impact: The Times-Picayune's return to daily prints is a reminder that sometimes the old ways are just stubborn enough to survive the digital age. Imagine a world where people actually read newspapers instead of scrolling mindlessly—scary thought, right?. Fact: Did you know that the decline of print media is often blamed on the rise of social media? Ironically, those same platforms are now filled with articles that people barely read! Welcome to the future of information: a constant stream of headlines with zero context..
• Headline: Seeking Clues to Heart Disease in DNA of an Unlucky Family. Impact: By studying the Del Sontro family's DNA, scientists might unlock secrets that could prevent future heart disease. This could lead to the creation of a new health trend—'Genetic Screening as the New Yoga'—where everyone starts to obsess over their DNA results instead of their chakras.. Fact: Did you know that heart disease is one of the leading causes of death globally? It’s the ultimate party crasher, but at least scientists are working hard to figure out why—talk about an uninvited guest!.
• Headline: San Diego Mayor Building Economic Bridges to Tijuana. Impact: Mayor Filner's efforts could spark a new trend of cross-border partnerships, leading to a bustling economy where the only thing crossing the border is cash, not illegal goods. Who knew a mayor could play economic matchmaker?. Fact: Did you know that San Diego and Tijuana are so close together that some people can practically throw a rock from one city to the other? That’s one way to make the commute to work more interesting—just dodge a few rocks and you're there!.