MAY 12, 2013

Full News Archive

• Headline: G.O.P. Delays on Nominees Heighten Senate Tensions. Impact: The GOP's delay on nominees set off a chain reaction where Senate committees became a battleground, leading to increased polarization and the eventual rise of reality TV as a political commentary. Who knew C-SPAN could rival 'Survivor'?. Fact: Did you know that Senate rules are so complicated that they make IKEA assembly instructions look like a children's book?.
• Headline: Knicks Struggle Against Pacers in Playoffs. Impact: The Knicks' scoring woes prompted a nationwide search for a 'basketball whisperer,' leading to spontaneous yoga classes for players that somehow became a trend in high schools everywhere. Namaste, basketball.. Fact: Fun fact: Roy Hibbert once blocked a shot so hard it created a new entry in the physics books under 'momentum transfer.'.
• Headline: IRS Targeting of Conservative Groups Controversy. Impact: The IRS's focus on conservatives gave birth to a new breed of political fundraising—where fear of audits became a rallying cry, leading to the birth of the 'Taxation is Theft' merchandise line. Who knew taxes could be so fashionable?. Fact: Did you know that the IRS once tried to audit a comedian? Turns out they couldn't find anything funny about 'deductible humor.'.
• Headline: Building a $325,000 Burger. Impact: The $325,000 burger led to a food revolution where lab-grown meat became the status symbol for the elite. In 2050, the phrase 'I only eat $1 million burgers' became a common boast at dinner parties.. Fact: In case you were wondering, the most expensive burger ever sold is still cheaper than a college education. Priorities, right?.
• Headline: In Taiwan, Lamenting a Lost Lead. Impact: Taiwan's lament over lost leads inspired a global trend of corporate leaders lamenting over coffee breaks, leading to the emergence of 'Corporate Whine' as a popular podcast genre. It’s like therapy, but with more PowerPoint.. Fact: Did you know that Taiwan produces more than 90% of the world's semiconductors? No pressure or anything!.