APRIL 24, 2013

Full News Archive

• Headline: Fisker's Struggles in Electric Vehicle Market. Impact: Fisker's downfall set off a chain reaction of skepticism towards electric cars, leading to a decade of car enthusiasts insisting that gas guzzlers are just 'more reliable.' Who knew a car startup could derail the future of clean energy by being... a car startup?. Fact: Fisker’s founders once claimed they could run on the dreams of environmentally conscious millennials. Spoiler: They couldn't..
• Headline: Economists Struggle to Find Solutions. Impact: The economists' inability to find solutions sparked a whole new industry in hedge fund management where 'guessing' became the primary strategy. Thanks, experts, for turning finance into a game of chance!. Fact: Did you know that the word 'economist' is derived from the Greek for 'one who is great at making everyone feel confused'?.
• Headline: Organic Avenue Expands Vegan Reach Nationwide. Impact: Organic Avenue's push for national exposure led to a massive increase in hipster cafes across America, causing an unprecedented rise in avocado toast prices. Who knew juice could lead to economic inflation?. Fact: Fun fact: In 2020, the average millennial consumed 1,000 shots of cold-pressed juice while contemplating their existential crises. Health first, feelings later!.
• Headline: Unraveling Boston Suspects’ Online Lives, Link by Link. Impact: The online lives of the Tsarnaev brothers prompted a surge in social media monitoring policies, making everyone feel like a potential suspect in their own lives. Privacy? What’s that?. Fact: Ironically, the brothers thought they were posting their 'greatest hits' when in reality, they were just laying out their downfall. Talk about a misguided social media strategy!.