MARCH 19, 2013

Full News Archive

• Headline: US Drug Costs Decline in 2012. Impact: The 1% drop in drug costs led to a surge in people switching to generics. This created a butterfly effect where suddenly everyone thought they could afford their medications, leading to a spike in non-prescription purchases of glittery vitamins and 'miracle' supplements. Big Pharma sat in a corner, crying into their overpriced champagne.. Fact: Did you know that generics are like the 'off-brand' cereal of medicine? Sure, they might not come in a flashy box, but they still get the job done!.
• Headline: Congress Examines Profit from Public Research. Impact: Congress's interest in profits from public research sparked a never-ending game of tag between private firms and taxpayers. Taxpayers, now it seems, had to keep dodging the 'pay your fair share' ball while private firms turned public research into an Olympic sport.. Fact: Fun fact: If you think about it, the government and drug companies are like the ultimate odd couple. One's always broke, and the other just wants to make a profit off the relationship!.
• Headline: EA CEO John Riccitiello Resigns. Impact: Riccitiello's resignation sent shockwaves through the gaming industry, leading to a wave of 'who's next?' speculation. This paved the way for a new generation of CEOs who, instead of focusing on gaming, prioritized their LinkedIn influencer status.. Fact: You know, resigning from a gaming company is basically like getting a game over screen. You just have to hope the next player doesn’t hit 'reset' too soon!.
• Headline: A Bank Levy in Cyprus, and Why Not to Worry. Impact: The calm after the Cyprus bank levy storm led to a bizarre phenomenon where people started ignoring financial crises altogether. This eventually resulted in the rise of 'Financial Crisis? What crisis?' parties, where participants wore blindfolds while discussing their portfolios.. Fact: Here's a fun tidbit: In finance, if you hear 'don't worry,' it usually means you're about to lose a ton of money. It's like a financial magician’s trick!.
• Headline: Vatican’s Bureaucracy Tests Even the Infallible. Impact: Pope Francis's struggle with the Vatican's bureaucracy turned into a cautionary tale about how even divine authority gets bogged down in red tape. This inspired a new genre of self-help books titled 'How to Tame Your Inner Pope.'. Fact: Did you know that the Vatican's bureaucracy is so complex, it makes the plot of 'Inception' look like a children’s bedtime story? Good luck getting to the bottom of that rabbit hole!.