NOVEMBER 20, 2012

Full News Archive

• Headline: Solar Solutions for Power Outages. Impact: If only solar companies had built their oasis a decade earlier, we could have avoided the great blackout of 2025. Now, thanks to their procrastination, we've been reduced to candlelight dinners and board games. Thanks, solar companies!. Fact: Did you know that solar energy is so clean, it could probably wash your dirty laundry? If only it could do your dishes too!.
• Headline: Tax Talks Raise Bar for Richest Americans. Impact: These tax talks stirred up a frenzy among the rich, causing them to invest in underground bunkers. Today, they’re fighting over who gets the penthouse in the apocalypse, all thanks to a few extra tax dollars!. Fact: Did you know that the only thing scarier than tax season is the idea of rich people actually paying their fair share? It's practically a horror movie plot!.
• Headline: Private Equity and Hostess Stumbling Together. Impact: The debacle of Hostess and private equity firms led to a nationwide 'Twinkie Crisis,' causing hoarding behaviors that made toilet paper look like candy. The Twinkie became a black market currency overnight!. Fact: Did you know that the lifespan of a Twinkie is longer than many friendships? It’s a solid reminder that some things just won’t go away, no matter how hard you try!.