OCTOBER 27, 2012

Full News Archive

• Headline: Romney Targets Coal Country for Campaign Boost. Impact: If Romney had won over the coal miners, we might have seen an alternate reality where coal was the key to renewable energy, and miners became the new environmental heroes. A future where coal-powered flying cars? Who knew mining could be so... versatile?. Fact: Fun fact: The only thing stronger than coal miners' love for their jobs is their ability to crush rocks with their bare hands. Seriously, don’t challenge them..
• Headline: Corporate Insights on Employee Voting Behavior. Impact: When companies started telling their employees how to vote, it paved the way for future corporate overlords. Now, instead of a simple 'choose wisely,' we might be living in a world where voting booths come with company logos and mandatory coffee breaks.. Fact: Did you know that back in the day, companies just told employees to vote for whoever would give them a raise? Progress, folks!.
• Headline: Mutual Fund Executives Seek Regulatory Compromise. Impact: If mutual fund leaders had succeeded in limiting restrictions, we could be living in a world where financial regulations were practically non-existent. Imagine a global economy where everyone invests in just about anything—like beanie babies or the next big TikTok star!. Fact: Fun fact: The only thing more complex than mutual fund rules is trying to understand why your friend keeps buying beanie babies..
• Headline: 5,800 Miles From New York, Ranger Finds Hockey and More. Impact: The exodus of NHL players to overseas leagues might have sparked a new global sport called 'Hockey Roulette.' If only someone had thought to combine the rules of hockey with the unpredictability of international travel. Gold medals all around!. Fact: Did you know that Kazakhstan actually has a thriving hockey scene? Apparently, they take their slap shots as seriously as their horse meat dishes..
• Headline: Rise in Household Debt Might Be Sign of a Strengthening Recovery. Impact: The rise in household debt could have led to a future where debt became the new currency. Imagine a world where people brag about their credit scores like they're high scores in video games. 'I just hit 800, what about you?'. Fact: Fun fact: The average American now has more credit card debt than the GDP of some small countries. Congratulations, you’re practically an economic superpower!.