OCTOBER 23, 2012

Full News Archive

• Headline: Election Influence on Federal Reserve Leadership. Impact: Romney’s promise to replace Bernanke created a timeline where economists started using ‘Bernanke’ as a verb, meaning to 'suddenly change course without warning.' This led to widespread confusion in both financial and casual conversations.. Fact: In politics, making promises is like making New Year’s resolutions: they sound great at first but are mostly forgotten by February..
• Headline: Tech Giants Adapt to Mobile Revolution. Impact: The scramble of tech giants to adapt led to a future where people find it easier to order a pizza from their smart fridge than to call a human being. This, of course, resulted in the Great Pizza Wars of 2025, fought over toppings and tech contracts.. Fact: If you ever feel overwhelmed by technology, just remember: even the tech giants once thought floppy disks were cutting-edge..
• Headline: Beware Dinner Talk on Identity and Islam. Impact: The dinner party gone awry sparked a cultural movement where dinner conversations became the new battleground for identity politics, ultimately leading to the invention of 'dinner party mediators'—professional negotiators specializing in awkward topics.. Fact: Hosting a dinner party is just a formal way of saying, 'Come over to my place so I can awkwardly judge your life choices while serving you questionable food.'.