DECEMBER 3, 2011

Full News Archive

• Headline: MCC Theater's New Home in Hell's Kitchen. Impact: The construction of the MCC Theater complex ignited a theater renaissance in Hell's Kitchen, leading to an influx of aspiring playwrights in the area. Coincidentally, this also resulted in a sudden rise in overpriced artisanal popcorn sales.. Fact: Did you know that 'Hell's Kitchen' used to be a rough neighborhood? Now it's just a rough neighborhood with overpriced rent and fewer muggings, thanks to the artsy types..
• Headline: Mystery of the Missing Red River Buckle. Impact: The missing belt buckle triggered a worldwide treasure hunt that inspired a generation of amateur sleuths and led to the creation of the Reality TV genre. Thanks to this, we now have more people arguing about who’s the best ‘survivor’ than ever before.. Fact: Did you know that Howard Hawks directed some of the best films of his time? If only he’d directed a better plan for keeping track of his accessories..
• Headline: American Airlines Struggles to Compete. Impact: American Airlines' struggles led to the rise of budget airlines, which in turn created a whole new vocabulary of travel-related anxiety. Who knew that ‘no-frills’ could also mean ‘no hope’?. Fact: Did you know that 'American' is also a brand of cheese? Not surprising, since both are aged but still somehow manage to be unappealing..
• Headline: By Raising Roof, Marlins Hope Interest Will Follow. Impact: The Marlins' attempt to draw in fans by literally raising the roof led to a city-wide trend of raising roofs, culminating in a bizarre architectural movement known as 'skyward thinking'—which thankfully didn’t catch on.. Fact: Did you know that 'Marlins' is a type of fish? Just like their fans, they tend to flop after a brief moment of excitement..
• Headline: U.S. Urges Creativity by Colleges to Gain Diversity. Impact: The push for creative admissions criteria led to colleges introducing bizarre rituals like interpretive dances and mandatory mime performances, ultimately resulting in the first-ever degree in 'Pretentiousness Studies'.. Fact: Did you know that diversity is often just a buzzword used by institutions? It’s like saying you have a 'variety' of chips when really, it’s just different flavors of plain..