JANUARY 21, 2011

Full News Archive

• Headline: Understanding the Volcker Rule's Impact. Impact: The vague guidelines of the Volcker Rule will ripple through time, leading future generations to wonder if 'vague' was just code for 'we have no idea what we're doing.'. Fact: The term 'Volcker' is now synonymous with 'that thing we said we’d fix but really just wanted to sound important.'.
• Headline: Gene Sperling: Architect of Economic Strategy. Impact: Sperling's appointment was the butterfly that flapped its wings and created a whirlwind of political strategists trying to outdo each other in a game of 'who can say the least while sounding profound.'. Fact: Gene Sperling once played a game of chess with the economy—unfortunately, the economy did not know it was a game..
• Headline: A Short-Circuit to Distracted Driving. Impact: This technology will eventually lead to a world where drivers are more focused on their phones than the road—thank you, progress!. Fact: Distracted driving: because who doesn’t want to add a little chaos to their morning commute?.
• Headline: Banks Want Pieces of Fannie and Freddie’s Business. Impact: The banks' desire to get involved with Fannie and Freddie will create a financial dance-off for decades, where everyone steps on each other's toes and nobody knows the choreography.. Fact: The phrase 'too big to fail' actually means 'too big to care about the little guy.'.