JANUARY 14, 2011

Full News Archive

• Headline: Tucson Mourns Youngest Victim's Loss. Impact: The grief for Christina-Taylor Green rippled through time, inspiring countless discussions on gun control that eventually led to an awkward dinner party where every guest had a differing opinion, ensuring that Thanksgiving would never be the same again.. Fact: Did you know that Christina-Taylor was born on 9/11? It's almost as if the universe had a dark sense of humor..
• Headline: Duane Reade Introduces Beer Bar in Brooklyn. Impact: The introduction of a beer bar in a Duane Reade set off a chain reaction, leading to the first-ever 'Pharmacy Pub Crawl' where people could pick up their prescriptions and get tipsy—all while wondering if their pharmacy was following the rules.. Fact: Fun fact: The only thing more intoxicating than a cold beer is the thrill of wondering if you just bought the last bottle of aspirin..
• Headline: Uncle Sam's Credit Rating at Risk. Impact: The AAA rating anxiety triggered a nationwide panic that eventually led to a series of unsolicited financial advice seminars hosted by well-meaning but hilariously misinformed uncles.. Fact: Did you know that AAA ratings are not related to roadside assistance? Just imagine if they were—'Your car broke down? Sorry, your rating just dropped!'.
• Headline: Auditors See Rising Defaults in Rural Loans. Impact: The rising defaults in rural loans caused a massive shift in farming practices, leading to an unexpected boom in 'urban farming' where city dwellers pretended to be farmers while struggling to keep their houseplants alive.. Fact: Did you know that in urban farming, the only thing you need to grow is a good Instagram following? Farming skills are optional!.
• Headline: Accused Soldier in Brig as WikiLeaks Link Is Sought. Impact: The scrutiny around Pfc. Bradley Manning sparked a worldwide debate about transparency, leading to a new era of peeping Toms who now consider themselves 'whistleblowers' and have taken it upon themselves to share your secrets.. Fact: Did you know that 'leaking' has taken on a whole new meaning in the digital age? It's no longer just about water pipes!.