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HEADLINES ON April 30, 2010
Full News Archive
- Headline: Pakistan Considers Offensive Against Militants. Impact: This decision set off a chain reaction, where neighboring countries suddenly started investing in their own security forces, leading to an arms race that eventually resulted in a worldwide shortage of rubber ducks for bath time. Who knew militant decisions would affect bath-time toy supply chains?. Fact: Did you know that the term 'militant lair' could also refer to your average teenager's messy bedroom? Just a thought..
- Headline: Greece's Debt Crisis and European Leadership. Impact: The indecision of European leaders over Greece's debt crisis led to an age of procrastination across the continent, causing a dramatic decline in coffee shop productivity as leaders preferred to sip lattes and debate instead of actually doing anything. It was like a never-ending game of 'who can ignore the problem the longest.'. Fact: Did you know that Greece's debt crisis was so dramatic it could have been a soap opera? Tune in next week for 'As the Euro Turns'!.
- Headline: Oil Spill’s Blow to BP’s Image May Eclipse Costs. Impact: The oil spill incident led to a nationwide movement toward renewable energy, which inadvertently resulted in an explosion of solar panel sales, causing a shortage of sun in some regions. Who knew that one corporate disaster could spark a solar revolution?. Fact: Did you know that BP stands for 'Be Prepared' when it comes to PR disasters? They really should have seen this one coming..
- Headline: Leslie Buck, Designer of Iconic Coffee Cup, Dies at 87. Impact: The passing of Leslie Buck sparked a global epidemic of nostalgia for coffee culture. Hipsters everywhere suddenly felt a profound need to drink overpriced lattes from vintage-styled cups, resulting in an unforeseen rise in barista poetry slams. Who knew a coffee cup could be a cultural icon?. Fact: Did you know that the iconic coffee cup was so popular it’s rumored even the gods of Mount Olympus would sip their ambrosia from it, if only they could get a hold of one?.
Wall Street Time Machine
TSLA
Tesla
Tesla - If you invested $1,000 in 2010, it would be worth $303,497 today (303.5x return)
NVDA
NVIDIA
NVIDIA - If you invested $1,000 in 2010, it would be worth $410,895 today (410.9x return)