FEBRUARY 3, 2010

Full News Archive

• Headline: Homeowners Facing Financial Hardships. Impact: As homeowners decided to just walk away, a new trend emerged: 'Home-ownership as a myth.' This led to a spike in hipster communes, where people lived in converted buses and called it 'minimalist freedom' while sipping overpriced coffee.. Fact: Fun fact: Walking away from your home became so trendy that it inspired a new dance move called 'The Foreclosure Shuffle'. It's a bit like the Macarena, but with more tears and fewer friends..
• Headline: $100 Million Bonus Controversy at A.I.G.. Impact: The uproar over the bonuses sparked a global revolution in corporate accountability, leading to a new reality show: 'America's Got Accountability' where CEOs compete to see who can be less of a jerk.. Fact: Did you know that $100 million in bonuses is basically the equivalent of giving a toddler a mountain of candy and expecting them to share? Spoiler: They won’t..
• Headline: Senate Race in New York Is a Tug of War Over Donors. Impact: The tug-of-war over donors created a new sport: Political Fundraising Wrestling. Politicians now train rigorously for intense bouts where they grapple for the biggest checks.. Fact: Did you know that in politics, 'donor' is just a fancy term for 'person who wants something in return'? Kind of like a genie, but with less magic and more lawyers..