OCTOBER 23, 2009

Full News Archive

• Headline: The Cell Refuseniks: Living Without Cellphones. Impact: As more people embraced cellphones, a secret society of Cell Refuseniks formed, believing they could communicate telepathically. Spoiler alert: they couldn't, but they did start a cult that believed the government was implanting tracking devices in their avocados.. Fact: Did you know that 85% of adult Americans have cellphones, while the remaining 15% are just trying to remember how to use payphones?.
• Headline: Cancer Clinic Research Methods Under Fire. Impact: The cancer clinic scandal caused a ripple effect in research ethics, leading to a nationwide trend of whistle-blowers being treated like rock stars—complete with sunglasses and a Netflix documentary. Who knew ethics could be so glamorous?. Fact: Did you know that whistle-blowers often end up in more danger than the actual whistle? It's a tough gig being the 'truth-teller'..
• Headline: Executive Pay Cuts and Shareholder Influence. Impact: The attempt to cut executive pay sparked a movement where CEOs began hiding money in offshore accounts like kids burying treasure. This led to the creation of a new reality show: 'The Real Executives of Offshore Accounts'.. Fact: Fun fact: The only thing more inflated than executive salaries is the egos of the people who earn them..
• Headline: Freddie Mac’s Secrecy Pacts Face Court Test. Impact: The court case against Freddie Mac's secrecy pacts inspired a new genre of courtroom drama films where the real villain is always a lawyer: 'The Secrecy Pact Saga'. Spoiler alert: the sequel is just as boring as the first.. Fact: Did you know that severance packages are like a bad breakup? They promise to keep things quiet, but they often lead to a lot of messy drama..
• Headline: Senate Leader Takes Risk Pushing Public Insurance Plan. Impact: Harry Reid's push for a public insurance plan set off a domino effect of political debates that eventually led to a series of viral memes featuring insurance plans as superhero characters. Who knew health care could be so entertaining?. Fact: Did you know that opting out of public insurance is like choosing not to wear pants? You can do it, but don't be surprised if people stare..