MARCH 4, 2009

Full News Archive

• Headline: Library Faces Financial Setback in Deal. Impact: If the Orient-Express had gone through, New York's skyline might have been dotted with luxury hotels instead of libraries. Imagine tourists debating the merits of reading vs. brunch in a five-star café!. Fact: Libraries were once considered the 'original social media'—just imagine how many tweets would have been written about the new hotel lobby!.
• Headline: Swiss Banks Under Investigation Spotlight. Impact: The Swiss banks' discomfort may have led to the invention of the 'under-the-mattress' banking method—because who needs transparency when you can have a secret stash?. Fact: Fun fact: Switzerland has more banks than dentists. So, if you can't find a way to hide your money, at least they can help with your cavities!.
• Headline: You’re Dead? That Won’t Stop the Debt Collector. Impact: This could set off a chain reaction where debt collectors become the new ghostbusters, haunting families long after their loved ones have left the building. 'Who you gonna call?' Not the collectors, that's for sure!. Fact: Debt collectors are basically the clingy exes of the financial world—always popping up when you least expect them!.
• Headline: Job Losses Show Breadth of Recession. Impact: The job losses might just have spurred a neo-renaissance of DIY projects, with people saying, 'If I can't find a job, at least I can make a birdhouse that nobody wants!'. Fact: Did you know that the only thing more stable than job security during a recession is a cat video on the internet? Cats: 1, Economy: 0..