FEBRUARY 1, 2009

Full News Archive

• Headline: Daschle's Tax Controversy Revealed. Impact: Daschle's failure to disclose his tax issues created a ripple effect in political transparency that led to future nominees being scrutinized more than a cat's Instagram account. Who knew a tax issue could make politicians more evasive than a cat avoiding a bath?. Fact: Did you know that Daschle's tax woes led to endless memes about 'paying your dues'? Maybe he should have just paid his taxes instead..
• Headline: Steve Martin's Musical Journey: A Bluegrass Passion. Impact: Steve Martin's transition from comedian to banjo enthusiast may have sparked a whole generation of hipsters to pick up string instruments, confusing banjos for 'authenticity' in their overpriced coffee shops. Thanks, Steve.. Fact: Did you know that Steve Martin is also a successful writer? Apparently, being funny isn't enough when you can also make people cry—just ask anyone who's read his memoir..
• Headline: There Will Be Extravagance: Riding High on Gushers of Black Gold. Impact: The obsession with Texas oil money may have led to a future where people believe being rich from oil is the same as being a genuine Texan. Spoiler alert: it isn’t. Just ask the cattle.. Fact: Did you know that 'gushers of black gold' is just a fancy way of saying 'let's pollute the earth while we make our fortunes'? Ah, the sweet smell of capitalism..
• Headline: They Float Like the Clouds on Air Do, They Enjoy .... Impact: The emergence of 'RuPaul’s Drag Race' has likely influenced countless individuals to embrace their authentic selves, while also leading to a rise in the number of drag queens in politics. Who knew fabulousness could become a platform?. Fact: Did you know that 'RuPaul's Drag Race' has crowned more queens than most monarchies? Talk about a royal legacy!.