OCTOBER 16, 2008

Full News Archive

• Headline: Cuomo's Push for A.I.G. Bonus Recovery. Impact: Cuomo's demand for A.I.G. bonuses set off a chain reaction, leading to the Great 'Where Did All the Bonus Money Go?' Mystery of 2010, causing many to invest in detective novels instead of the stock market.. Fact: Did you know that A.I.G. stands for 'Amazingly Incompetent Greed'? Just kidding, but it might as well!.
• Headline: Bulgarian Mafia Influences Political Landscape. Impact: The mob's influence in Bulgaria led to a secret society of corrupt politicians who now moonlight as reality TV stars, showcasing how to bribe with style.. Fact: Fun fact: In Bulgaria, saying 'no' to corruption can cost you a seat at the dinner table—and possibly your dinner..
• Headline: Home Prices Continue to Decline. Impact: The prediction of falling home prices led to a nationwide panic, triggering a DIY home renovation craze as people decided that building igloos was a better investment than staying in their homes.. Fact: Did you know that economists always say home prices will fall? It's kind of their version of 'the sky is falling'—but much less entertaining..
• Headline: A Somali Influx Unsettles Latino Meatpackers. Impact: The influx of Somali workers sparked a nationwide trend of 'Cultural Cuisine Fusion', where taco trucks began serving Somali-inspired tacos, confusing everyone but delighting foodies.. Fact: Did you know that the meatpacking industry is just a fancy term for 'let’s see how many cultural stereotypes we can challenge at once'?.
• Headline: Hip-Hop Coming of Age for Suburban Prince Hal. Impact: The hip-hop musical featuring a white boy from Westchester opened the floodgates for all suburban kids to pursue their dreams of becoming rappers, leading to an explosion of 'rap battles' at PTA meetings.. Fact: Did you know that the average age of a suburban hip-hop fan is actually just as confused about their identity as they are about how to pronounce 'A$AP Rocky'?.