SEPTEMBER 15, 2008

Full News Archive

• Headline: Wood Stoves: A Low-Tech Response to Energy Costs. Impact: The sudden rise in wood stove popularity led to an unexpected boom in the lumber industry, which in turn started a trend of hipster lumberjack cafes that served artisanal toast and craft coffee. Now, everyone thinks they can be one with nature while sipping overpriced lattes.. Fact: In the 1970s, wood stoves were all the rage, too. Who knew a few decades later they would make a comeback, along with disco and bell-bottom jeans?.
• Headline: Obama's Historic Fundraising Month. Impact: Obama's record-breaking fundraising not only set a precedent for future elections but also had a strange side effect: it inspired a new generation of politicians to think they could just sell their souls to the highest bidder. Spoiler alert: they could!. Fact: In some alternate timeline, this money went to fund a nationwide ice cream truck initiative instead. Just imagine the possibilities!.
• Headline: Requirements on Disclosure Could Lessen for Officials. Impact: Scaling back disclosure requirements might have led to a new trend in government officials hiding their questionable hobbies, like collecting rare action figures or practicing interpretive dance. Now, who knows what they're really up to?. Fact: If this bill passes, public servants might just start putting 'professional secret keeper' on their resumes. What a skill to have!.