MARCH 23, 2008

Full News Archive

• Headline: Upcoming Events in the Midwest. Impact: The Midwest's weather patterns shifted dramatically after this headline, leading to an influx of tourists who believed they could experience all four seasons in one day. Little did they know, they were just in the wrong time zone.. Fact: Did you know that the Midwest has more corn than people? So, if you ever needed a friend, just remember, there's always a corn stalk willing to listen..
• Headline: The Risks of Seeking Third-Party Opinions. Impact: The rise of unsolicited third-party opinions led to a reality show phenomenon where buyers and brokers argued over who had the 'better' opinion, ultimately resulting in a national pastime of debating which sandwich shop had the best turkey sub.. Fact: Fun fact: In a world where opinions are free, so are bad decisions. Just ask any buyer who listened to their neighbor's dog about real estate!.
• Headline: Understanding the Credit Crisis Origins. Impact: The frantic search for answers created a new breed of economists who now proudly wear 'I survived the credit crisis' t-shirts and run workshops on how to panic effectively.. Fact: Interestingly, the credit crisis was so intense that it inspired a series of motivational posters in offices worldwide, reminding everyone that 'Failure is just success in progress.'.
• Headline: Even at Megastores, Hagglers Find No Price Is Set in Stone. Impact: The emergence of haggling at megastores led to an underground economy of coupon pushing and discount whispering, eventually resulting in the invention of a new currency: the 'Bargain Buck'.. Fact: Did you know that haggling has been around since ancient times? In fact, it’s the only skill that has survived the test of time, with the exception of procrastination, which is still going strong..
• Headline: Yes, It’s Local, Even in Winter. Impact: Farmers' markets becoming a year-round phenomenon sparked a worldwide trend of hipster farmers creating artisanal kale that was later deemed 'the new superfood,' leading to a global kale shortage by 2025.. Fact: Fun fact: Connecticut farmers’ markets have more organic kale than all the kale in the diets of the average college student. Who knew health could be so... leafy?.