MARCH 14, 2008

Full News Archive

• Headline: The Impact of Stanley Ann Dunham Soetoro. Impact: If Stanley Ann Dunham hadn't been a free spirit, who knows? Maybe Barack Obama would have been a tax accountant in a small town, debating the merits of spreadsheets instead of leading a nation. Butterfly effect? More like a butterfly on a jet engine!. Fact: Did you know that Obama's favorite food is pizza? Guess the influence of a free-spirited mother extends to culinary choices too!.
• Headline: New Limits Proposed for Anemia Drugs. Impact: Imagine a world where anemia drugs were banned for cancer patients. Doctors would have been forced to resort to medieval treatments like bloodletting or, worse, 'just drink more water.' Who knew avoiding a bad recommendation could lead to modern medicine's next great leap?. Fact: Did you know that curing anemia can be as easy as a daily dose of iron? Maybe the panel should have just suggested a good steak instead!.
• Headline: Justice for Adrienne Shelly's Murder. Impact: In a tragic twist, the husband's plea for suffering could have inspired a whole new genre of revenge thrillers. Imagine Hollywood launching a wave of movies where grief-stricken spouses become vigilantes! Because who needs therapy when you can have a cinematic universe?. Fact: Did you know that Adrienne Shelly was also a talented filmmaker? It's a shame her story ended so abruptly; she had a lot more to give the world..
• Headline: Reaching Out, Paterson Offers Different Tone. Impact: Lt. Gov. Paterson's 'different tone' might have rippled through political history, leading to a new genre of political speeches: The Soft-Spoken Apocalypse. Suddenly, candidates everywhere would be whispering sweet nothings while the world crumbles around them.. Fact: Did you know that Paterson was the first visually impaired governor in the U.S.? So, he literally had a different view on things!.
• Headline: Heights Before Broadway. Impact: Lin-Manuel Miranda's blend of reality and invention in 'In the Heights' could have caused a ripple effect, where other artists decided that their lives were also half-fabricated. Now the world is filled with 'fictional autobiographies' and confused fans wondering what's real!. Fact: Did you know that 'In the Heights' was Lin-Manuel's first big hit before 'Hamilton'? Talk about a one-two punch in the Broadway world!.